The Binky Fairy visits Minnesota

I heard a quote once that said "I was a better mother before I became one".

Now, 3 kids into this journey, I nod my head in understanding.  While pregnant with Emersyn, I read every pregnancy book.  Followed every pregnancy rule.  Read every parenting magazine and took heart to all the "rules" of raising kids.

Then...life happened.  I realized that so many of those "rules", must be written by people who don't have kids, or maybe have never even been pregnant.  (Because really...who eliminates caffeine anyways?!)  You adjust the "rules" to reality.  Who has time to always have a home cooked meal each night?  After work, I'd really often rather just play with my kids than cook....hello, fast food.  Those french fries I said Emersyn would never have?  She loves them, thankyouverymuch, McDonald's.  (Though in my defense, Emersyn was 2 before she had a fry and over 2 before she had candy.  She has yet to have soda!)

One thing that I decided not to worry much about  amongst all the "rules" was her binky.  She has loved her pink binky since she was tiny.  Her first birthday came and went.  That was going to be "the day" I did what society thinks you should do and take the binky away.  I couldn't do it.  Her 2nd birthday came and went.  I couldn't do it.   We eventually only allowed it during naps and bedtime.  Her 3rd birthday came.  She woke up really sick.  Fever, puking.  She spent the day laying on the floor or next to me on the couch. She wanted her binky.

Her binky she received.  She had so many life changes happening (just switched daycare, and I went on bedrest the week of her birthday).  Her binky really was her security.  I went through it in my head so many times, and could never come up with a real solid reason as to why taking it away from her to cause tears and anxiety was the right thing to do.

Travis and I disagreed about it several times.  He tried on more than one occasion to take it away cold turkey.  (We obviously know who won that one!)

There's something that comes with being a mommy, that only a mommy can really understand.  As much as it may have been lack of energy and not wanting to sit up with my crying, heartbroken daughter all night, I also just figured that she is 3.  Only 3.  In the grand scheme of life, who really gives a rip if she has her binky for 3 years?  Or 4 years?  Or even 5 years for that matter?  Whose rule was it that "your 3 year old should not still have a binky!"

I ignored the unsolicited advice and opinions.  From friends, from strangers, from family. My 3 year old, now 3.5 year old, still was using her binky. 

I decided not to push the issue because in my opinion, it was doing NO harm.  She has the speech and vocabulary of a 25 year old and the whole thought that it messes up teeth is a myth. (The boys' pediatrician backed me on that one.  I was glad Travis was present to hear it! :)

(Hi.  My name is Amber, and I am a weakling)

Besides, in managing a household with twins and a preschooler, there are far more important battles to pick than whether or not your 3.5 year old can have her binky.

(I just crossed my fingers that she wouldn't march down for her high school graduation with her pink binky in tow.)

This past Sunday evening, as I was home alone with the kids, Emersyn said...

"Mommy?  I don't use binkies anymore!"

I took that as an opportunity to talk about it.  She was ready. I was ready.  She gathered her 2 pink binkies and put them in a cup of water.

We wrote a note to the Binky Fairy, who was going to be delivering the beloved pink binkies to a new baby in need of a binky (according to our conversation).

She only asked for a sucker in return.

There was no tears, no anxiety.  No second guessing her decision.  She was beyond proud of herself and so confident!  She said to me..."Mommy, I am proud of me too!"  

I called Travis The Binky Fairy at work and asked him her to bring home a special lollipop for the Binky Graduate.

The Binky Fairy was feeling generous and did just a bit more than that.

The Binky Graduate was quite happy with the reward...

And the binky-lovers in training cheered her on in approval.